How to Talk to Your Teen

You may think your teen won’t listen to you, but think again. In study after study, young people cite their parents as a primary factor in their decisions and they typically cite their parents higher than the emphasis placed on friends.

You cannot, however, lecture. No one likes to be lectured to—not even you. The best thing to do is to create a conversation that is tailored to your child. In other words, the discussion has to include what is important to your child.

Begin by simply talking to your child about his or her passion—whether its sports, drama, spending time with friends or driving the family car, the realities and consequences of underage drinking must have a personal connection to things and people they care about. For example, you can frame the discussion in the context of “you could lose your place on the team”, “you could jeopardize your possibilities for a scholarship” or “you could be injured and not be able to participate in an event.”

Here are some other things to help you when talking to your teen about drinking:

• Discuss real-world consequences to underage drinking including the high fines of a minor in possession, drunk driving, loss of driver’s license and possibility of no longer participating in extracurricular activities.
• Remind them that it is illegal for those under 21 to drive with any amount of alcohol in their system.
• Listen to them and respect what they say.
• Make clear that your expectation is he or she not drink.
• Teach your children about the dangers of underage drinking.
• Discuss laws about underage drinking, including the age 21 law.

You may think you are not being heard above the music, the phone calls, text messages and clicking of the keyboard, but you are.  So keep talking.